Saturday, August 18, 2007

I'm dangerous tonight

While running the vacuum through the living room today, I sucked up a decorative hanging cloth which nearly pulled down a big plant and which did cause a figurine to take a swan dive onto the ground. I keep the Superglue company in business.

Before I could shut the machine off, the damn thing had almost eaten the whole cloth. Horrible, acrid smoke started pouring out of it and I soon discovered that I had burned up the belt on the machine.

Attempting to extricate it, I spattered the carpet with soot which repeated applications of Woolite have done nothing to resolve.

Attempting to light a candle to clear out some of the burnt-rubber stench, I dropped the lit match into a pile of plastic grocery bags, which could have been a real disaster.

I need to give up and go to bed.


Laura Stamps said...

How funny! I think everyone has done that at least once. The suction on a vacuum cleaner is so powerful it will go for anything it gets close to (even very long hair like mine...grin!). And then you have burned up the belt, and what a stink it makes! Looks like I need to send some faeries your way to help you clean up the mess!

I am happy to have found your blog today through Carmen's! I am a Wiccan Faery Witch who writes magickal urban fantasy novels ("The Witchery Series") and mystical poetry books. Come visit my blog "Magickal Novels & Empowering Thoughts for Women" at


Hopefully, my posts will make you feel better after such a disasterous day of trying to clean.

Sending many faery hugs and kisses your way today!

eastcoastdweller said...

Laura: Thank You for visiting my blog and for commiserating with me on the obnoxious tendencies of the common vacuum cleaner.

If Your faeries have something stronger than Woolite to clean up carpet spots, they are more than welcome!

It's neat to see that we've met through Carmen, who is the perfect example of an enlightened Woman --happy to be alive, happy to be a Woman and fully aware of Her beauty and willing to admit it -- yet without an iota of so-called vanity.

Now it's my turn to visit Your site.

...Kat said...

a whole series of unfortunate events.

I recommend this to you from the Frasier TV show, my favorite clip: Niles having a Bad Day

-Jeane Michelle Culp said...

One shouldn’t laugh at anothers’ expense, however; I can’t help but to be bursting hysterically if only in appreciation of the fact in knowing someone else has these kind of days also. Thank you eastcoastdweller for being human!

eastcoastdweller said...

I am indeed very human, clumsy as a drunken elephant at times, capable of the most ridiculous twisted-tongue-isms, sometimes bold, sometimes shy and quite often as forgetful as an old professor.

Rebecca said...

Mamma said there'd be days like that, mamma said, mamma said! I seem to remember that bit as lyrics to a song i remember nothing else of!

I once sucked up the leg of a lovely pair of cream colored slacks with my vaacum. Ruined!!

I think after your list of mishaps, a glass of wine, and straight to bed would be my course of action. :)

...amarpreet said...

Wow, dangerous with a loaded vacuum!

Yup, definitely not a good day for that smell gone?

Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

Hilarity at it's finest! Of course, not for you at the time, but for us now.
Thanks for sharing that moment in time!

Carmen said...



Molly said...

I'm a big fan of lighting a small candle when it would be much more tempting to curse the darkness, or the vacuum cleaner!

eastcoastdweller said...

Rebecca: I wouldn't trust myself with alcohol when I am in one of those uber-clumsy phases.

Empress: The stench has finally gone. Phew, it smelled like the Michelin Man spent too long at a Mexican restaurant.

Carmen and Indigo: Laugh away -- You'll miss out on the great fun of repairing a vacuum cleaner this weekend.

Molly: Lighting a candle almost made my bad night even worse. I love candles but I can't be trusted around them.