Screaming in silence

We will not be renewing your contract.

Seven horrible, terrifying, cruel words.

Words I must live with.

I have felt for some time that the new boss did not like me much. I have worked harder than ever before. But obviously, to no avail.

I am in agony. I have told no one. I can scream out my misery here, on this anonymous blog.

Everything I have worked for is in danger. We are one paycheck away from losing the house and the car. How will we eat?

It has taken every ounce of my energy to keep the awful news hidden from my beloved this weekend. To pretend that all is well. Why should I cause her to worry, until absolutely necessary? In a perfect world, I would find a better job in the few weeks I have left until my sands run out at this one, and then I could share the bad news with her but calm it with the good news.

I have not been jobless since leaving college. I am terrified.